exactly thirty-eight days ago, i embarked on yet another milestone birthday!

and this was the BIG one…

(well, the biggest one to date…)

the one that rhymes with such alluring words as:

–  Dirty

–  Flirty

–  Purdy

–  Sturdy

(you get the drift of it…)

ahhhh yes, the BIG 3-0!

10,957 days, 262,968 hours, 15,778,080 minutes, and 946,684,800 seconds older…

but who’s counting?!

so like most people my age, i was simultaneously dreaming of and dreading it…

but after spending the entire month of April celebrating its inevitable arrival, i ended up getting over it almost as quickly as it popped up…

and to be completely honest, not too much has changed.

however, i have noticed a few differences that i am not necessarily thrilled about:

–      i have about five actual white hairs… i swear the minute it became midnight, those little fuckers just blissfully sprouted out!

–      i still do not like wine… i was under the impression that when i hit my 30’s, that i would somehow develop an affinity for it, but alas, i was mistaken.

–      i have a single wrinkle over my left eyebrow that is currently wreaking a ton of havoc on my forehead… and it is making me extremely uncomfortable!

–      i have attended an engagement, wedding, or baby shower almost every week… and i am still over here like, well, if you even kind of sort of enjoy it, then maybe you might want to consider putting a ring, string or placeholder on it?

but one thing will remain true no matter how many years pass me by…

i may be getting older, but growing up is never an option.

now, LET THEM EAT CAKE!