this is my absolute favorite time of the year!
not because it is chilly (SoCal does not know how to be cold) and cuddling is the only sport i know how to play (snuggling and spooning constitute as competitive athleticism)…
but because layering on more clothing and wearing oversized sweaters gives me ample space to fill out a little more, if you will.
in other words, it is almost Thanksgiving and eating food is something i am exceptionally good at.
for the past couple of years, i have upheld a “tradition” of jotting down certain ‘nouns’ that i am thankful for…
two years ago, my list was pretty generic:
family, friends, significant other, etc.
last year, my list was a bit more unorthodox:
less obvious people, places, things, etc.
therefore this year, i have decided to list stuff that i am unthankful for…
because even the more annoying aspects of life deserve a dishonorable mention.
so please refer to the bullet points below, as i arrange some of the things i can really do without, in no particular order…
- any type of smokers
- idiots who pronounce Saturday as Sourday
- Madonna’s veins
- people who constantly talk about their weight when they are not even fat or overweight
- perpetual laggers or even worse, ones that do not call when they are going to be late
- folks who endlessly whine about being broke/continuously brag about their riches
- coworkers who still come in to the office when they are deathly sick
- individuals who cannot spell correctly/lack of punctuation in text messages
- extremely private people who want to keep everything a secret
(you’re not mysterious, you’re creepy)
- couples who share social media profiles
(get it together, crazies)
- someone who is fully capable of doing something, but asks you to do it instead
- shit sandwich breath, unkempt bathrooms and wheezing coughs
- people who overstay their fucking welcome
of course, there is soooo much more that i could add, but i am also thankless about complainers.
anyway, enjoy your day/evening of devouring deliciousness and guzzling gluttony…
because you totally deserve it.